A BIG BONUS!

Lately...

He turned 8!  

I am lucky to now have a bonus Dad, 2 bonus older brothers, a bonus older sister, 2 bonus nieces, and 2 bonus nephews.  The title "step" is so cold, so I use "bonus" because that's truly how I feel.  There ya go.  The story began 50 years ago at the prom, and continues.....

Because of the family additions, my brother was in town, so we had some crazy times and loved being together.

Sh** Happens

Today marks the end of a long relationship in our lives.  Some know, some don't... but, Juliana has been seeing a therapist for the last 5 years.  She's been going every wednesday, same time, same place, same doctor.  Today was the last of those appointments.  I think if it was of professional behavior, her therapist would've sobbed the ugly cry too.

They painted wooden pencil holders and ate cupcakes together today, talked about accomplishments, and goals, proud moments, not-so-proud moments, and successes.

Starting over is a good thing, it's just hard.  The next one will probably be good, probably be helpful, but it's just not the same.  When I hear the therapist tell me, "Sh** happens.  It's gonna be okay", that's how I know I've scored the jackpot.  While I'm not looking for that to happen from anyone else, I am looking for another jackpot for Juliana.  She has come SO far, with a long way to go.

There are usually a handful (or two) of people who change the course of your life.  Juliana has one.  On to the next....

Brand new

I knew this week would bring upon some new experiences.  I knew this week would be different.  I did not know just how much would be different.

Juliana began Catholic school.  She began middle school.  She began school on the other side of town.  She puts on a uniform every morning.  The color of shirt is different, socks are clean, yet still the same.  The sameness of her clothing is so different.  She used to wear jeans one day, skirt another day, blue nail polish on her toes, purple on her fingers, sandals on a wednesday, and sneakers on a friday.  Nope, not anymore.  It's all a good thing, but just so different than what would happen each n' every morning.  She comes home talking about new teachers, new friends, new schedule, a locker combination.... Yowzers!

Kevin is still home.  He's still at the same public school.  Obviously he will begin a new adventure in 3rd grade.  He looped in 1st/2nd grade, so once again, it'll be different for him in 3rd grade.  For those who do not know what "looping" is, it means the child has the same classroom, same teacher, same class for two years.  He's already disappointed the bonds he made in first and second grade are torn apart.  Most are going to the same class, but he isn't in THAT class.  He does love his teacher though.

It's been strange having a week alone with him.  We went to Starbucks this morning.  Just us.  Yesterday we went for a long bike ride, park time, swimming, and even folded laundry together.  Very new, I love it.

Cross Country practice began this week too.  First organized sport for Juliana.  She's terrified of coaching, especially since the coach looks more like an Olympic triathlete, than a K-8 cross country coach.  He's really nice, yet gonna be tough.  That's gonna be different for her (and me).

Cheers to new adventures, and different experiences!  I'm embracing it.... s l o w l y.

We are back

We've been back from our annual vacation for about a week.  To say that it was action packed (as usual), would be an understatement.  A blast, exhausting, and as always, not enough time, yet long enough.  :)

My favorite part of every vacation is for my kiddos to reconnect and make memories with family/friends.  It's a wonderful feeling!  The next best feeling is.... getting ALLLLLL of the pictures in the mail from Shutterfly and redecorating the house with the numerous frames.

On to thinking about school.... oh geeze.

No thanks

Wish I could type more.  The fall on Father's Day was pretty bad.  Went to doc (again) on friday.  I left with a referral that said, "Hand surgery".  No thanks.  I hope the hand surgeon disagrees.  Looks like I have to wear my cast/splint thingy for my entire vacation too.  No thanks... but I will, 'cause without it, well, it hurts.  Wait, with it hurts too.  Boo.  Just stinks.

Happy July everyone!

The Drop Off

In the summer of 2006, I went to Once Upon A Child (a used clothing/toys, etc) store for children.  I was turning in old baby and girlie girl clothes.  After I turned in the items, I roamed around with a nutty 4 year old and my bulky stroller with baby Kev.  Near the toys was a mom telling her little girl she couldn't have the Little People set because they were there to spend money on clothes, not toys.  Busy body ol' me, jumped in and told her that I had a ton of clothes at home for her 2 year old daughter.  To make a long story short, we exchanged phone numbers and e-mail, and about a week later, I came over with a ton of clothes for Claire.  Play date followed.

Since then, she moved out of Michigan, and clearly we did too.  We've always sent Christmas cards, and have been facebook friends too, although I haven't seen her since the day I dropped off the clothes. Well, I did see her on America's Funniest Home Videos, but that doesn't count.....

Today, I saw her Daddy passed away.  I melted.  A man I never knew, the dad to a woman I hardly know.  I don't know why I got all mushy about it.  I guess I realized that I'd never be able to support her, if I never overheard her telling Claire about needing clothes, rather than toys.  It's really the little things that lead to bigger and more meaningful things in life.

Lesson at Lunch

The other day, Juliana left her lunch at home.  Normally, I let it sit on the kitchen table or the counter.  This day, I brought it to her because she had tutoring after school, and well, my mommy-feel-bad meter was off the charts.  So I park the car, walk into the courtyard with about 150 other kids, and look for Juliana.  I see her sitting on a set of three stairs with two girls.

She runs up to me and thanks me for bringing her lunch.

I followed her back to the stairs, and it hit me who she was sitting with.  One is a girl she's been friends with since Kindergarten.  Never super close, but a girl who has always 'had her back'.  The other one........ a girl who has called Juliana a b**** numerous times, blamed Juliana for her fathers death, harasses her at every opportunity since 2nd grade, and more.  At first I was so frustrated that the millions of tears I've seen, and the multitude of conversations about, "STAY AWAY FROM HER" were ignored.

Then I realized, this girl is so lonely.  She's burned every bridge, and there's Juliana, filling a void for her.

When Juliana got home that day, I talked to her about allowing this girl to enter her life again.  She did not really have an answer for me as to why they're "hanging out" again.  It was then that I realized that the (excuse the language, but I'm saying it anyway for a lack of words right now) Bullsh** Meter I installed in Juliana is fully functioning.  She can occasionally detect crap being slung at her and move forward without a full on meltdown at home afterward.

Juliana is giving this girl another opportunity to feel welcome at school.  She's doing it with caution, yet allowing this girl to screw up, and make things better.  Nobody else has given this girl that chance.  Frankly, Juliana knows how it feels.  She's been the one this school year to screw up, and those she once called friends were sitting nowhere near those three stairs at lunch that day, or any day.